As we close the chapter on one year and step into another, it’s natural to reflect on where we are financially, how much we saved, how much we spent, and how we’re planning for the future. But this season of goal-setting isn’t just about money. It’s also about health, and not just the kind you track with a smartwatch.
Because, as it turns out, financial health, physical health, and social health are all deeply intertwined. And right now, our social health is suffering. America is in the midst of a full-blown loneliness epidemic, and it’s quietly cutting into our life expectancy, our mental well-being, and even our wallets.
This week on the HerMoney Podcast, Jean Chatzky sat down with Ken Stern, longevity expert and author of the new book: “Healthy to 100: How Strong Social Ties Lead to Long Lives,” to talk about why social connection is the missing link in America’s health and aging crisis, and how we can all take steps to fix it.
What Is the Loneliness Epidemic, Really?
Jean Chatzky: There’s been a lot of talk lately about this loneliness epidemic. The American Perspectives Survey said that the number of adults who say that they have no close friends, which, I have to say, is just heartbreaking, has quadrupled since 1990. Those who say they have 10 or more close friends have dropped by nearly threefold. Is this uniquely American? Is it because we don’t live in communal environments like many other countries? Do we just work too much? What’s going on?
Ken Stern: We live almost a decade less in good health than other healthy countries. It wasn’t always that way. What happened was all the activities that brought us together, churches, unions, sewing circles, PTA, all began to decline. We spent less time together, and it was all replaced by technology, first television, and now phones.
If you go to the subway in Seoul or Singapore, people are exactly like they are in New York. They’re face down in their phones, but what they’ve done, which we really haven’t done, is they’ve created new institutions of social connection to bring people together. So the loneliness crisis here is sort of like the weather. Everyone talks about it, but no one does anything about it. Other places they’re doing something about it.
The New Retirement Plan: Purpose + People
Jean Chatzky: You open the book with a story about a town in Japan where a company mainly employs women over 60. So what kind of work were they doing? What did you find when you got there? What did you learn from the women there, and how would you apply those lessons in the US?
Ken Stern: Increasingly in Japan, people associate work with better health. It’s actually a concept called Ikigai. Retiring at 60 or 65 doesn’t really make sense in an era of much longer life. What people need as they age is ways to continue to have purpose and meaning, and often in places like Japan, that is through work.
When I interviewed older people about work, almost invariably, they reported they were doing it because they didn’t want to be stuck alone in the house. They wanted to be in community. They wanted to have a reason to get out of bed. They wanted to find ways to be together with people. And when I asked them when they wanted to retire, they would almost invariably say I want to stop working when I can no longer work. It was the anthem of the conversation because people associated that type of work with being healthy and being an important contributor to society.
Purposeful Places, Not Parties: Where Real Connection Begins
Jean Chatzky: If there was one piece of advice that you would give this community for dealing with the loneliness epidemic and living happily and healthfully to 100, what would it be?
Ken Stern: A statement I often hear is, ‘I’m an introvert. It’s hard for me to be socially connected.’ Social connection is not about being the life of the party or buying rounds at a bar. It’s putting yourself in places where you can be next to people who share values, ideas, and commitments.
And that could be work, but it could also be volunteering, it could be lifelong learning. It could be an intergenerational community and neighborhoods. Think about what brings value to you and put yourself in those places, and social connections will hopefully come as a happy result of that.
MORE ON HERMONEY:
- How to Not Get Ripped Off When Buying A New Car
- How To Make Extra Money During The Holidays
- Ask Jean: Are CDs Worth It Right Now, Or Should I Keep My Cash Liquid?
More money news when you need it! Get the latest and greatest updates on all things investing, budgeting, and making money. Subscribe to the HerMoney newsletter at Hermoney.com/subscribe!
